My Only Victory
by Naughty Alpha
Summary: Light discovers that he has an interesting reaction to victory, and that he has a strange desire because of it. He wants L and there is nothing to stop him from taking him before he is able to watch his death. L accepts his fate that he knows is coming, he knows he lost but is surprised when Light shows up at his room. LxLight and M for language and Lemon in later chapters.
1. There Are Worse Ways

**Thanks for being here :) This story is going to switch view points between the two guys. Please let me know what you think! I will post later chapters regardless but I would still really like to know how everyone feels. And don't worry the lemony stuff will be here.  
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 **Disclaimer: Alpha does not own Death Note although she wished she did...**

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My Only Victory

 **Light POV**

 _Victory feels sooo good,_ Light thought. He was sitting on the couch in the main from of HQ. Everyone was talking to Rem, except L who was examining the Death Note. Ah the Death Note, as soon as he had put his hands on it back in the helicopter last night all of his memories came back in a rush and he was able to kill Higuchi without L noticing, making it so he could keep his memories. He thought about the guy he had been when he didn't have it, believing that Kira was a criminal and wanting to bring him down, it was ridiculous and predictable of that naive boy he had been but that was all over now, and soon…so very soon, L was going to die. Light had won, outsmarted the man who was supposed to be the world's greatest detective and he was so excited for the moment when L's life would finally be extinguished he could hardly wait.

This great victory had him in a state of euphoria that he hadn't been able to figure out until last night when he went to bed, for once on his own since L hadn't had a choice be to take those damn handcuffs off. He hadn't been able to sleep…because he had been aroused just thinking about his accomplishment. It was strange, before the Death Note he had never really had anything that could get him so excited, sure he had had erections that needed to be taking care of before just like every other guy does. But they weren't caused by anything specific. He had always been too busy being the perfect son that he hadn't really ever thought about those kinds of things before.

Then after he got the Death Note that hadn't changed, he had to keep up with his perfect boy routine on top of punishing criminals, and later getting rid of that FBI agent and his fiancé, then he had to work around L, and ended up in solitary confinement before it was time to relinquish ownership of the Death Note. While he was here working on the case and temporarily back to his old self he had hardly had time to sleep and shared a bed with L, so he was thankful he had never been plagued with being turned on by just anything. Misa had tried, teasing him all the time trying to get a reaction. It hadn't worked.

But even now as he sat on the couch thinking about L's coming demise he felt himself begin to harden in his slacks. At first he thought about finally taking Misa like she'd been so annoying about. It had made sense, she was attractive and he was sure he would be able to find it pleasing. But when he thought about it wasn't _right._ He had been awake half the night trying to figure out what his damn body wanted. And it had hit him hard. His victory was over L, and he wanted nothing more than to find a way to rub that in the egotistical fuckers face. He wanted to fuck L…to dominate him one more time before his death. It would be so easy, he had noticed L's reactions to him, and the more he thought about it…it didn't really seem to bother him that he was planning on seducing a guy. The thought should have disgusted him, realizing that he could feel attracted to a guy even - if the initial reason was to dominate - but when he had realized that's what he wanted the sexual need had taken him and he had stroked himself to the thought of L begging beneath him.

It was so wrong and he wanted it more than anything. He looked at L from across the room. Light had never had sex before but, even if he was no good at it the first time, which was unlikely because he was good at everything, it wouldn't matter because he didn't care if L got off too, this wasn't going to be about sex, it was going to be about showing L how wrong he had been to challenge Kira. In a few hours everyone would go to bed and then he could make his move. The anticipation only made him crave it more.

 **L POV**

L sat on his computer desk, still examining the Death Note. He wished he could try it out, but since he already knew it worked that would be wrong. But it was almost tempting to add Light Yagami's name under all of the others. He was still convinced that he hadn't been wrong about that boy this whole time, he was L, he was never wrong. But he was part of the justice system so he couldn't keep Light under constant surveillance anymore when everyone else was convinced of his innocence and he certainly couldn't kill him, using the Death Note or otherwise, he wasn't about to taint his name. But he _knew_ he hadn't been wrong. And that was why he also knew that it was very likely that he was going to die within the next few days. Probably at the hands of this _shinigami._ Because if he was right, Light had somehow orchestrated this whole thing that meant that Rem was working with him for some reason. All of that was another reason he couldn't test the Death Note out on Light, if he was going to die soon he wanted to go where he was meant to go, and the Death Note said that Heaven and Hell were real and he was inclined to believe it, that didn't seem like a rule that would be faked…but those last two…

L sighed and put the Death Note down so he could grab another treat. No, one or both of those last rules were fake, and the shinigami would have had to have been the one to put them there. What he couldn't figure out was what did Light have to offer this death god? He turned his chair around to look at the team, still nibbling on an assortment of sweets. He saw Light staring at him from on the couch, keeping eye contact for a heartbeat before tactfully joining in the conversation everyone else was having. For what it was worth, L did admire Lights intelligence, not his whole crazy, superiority complex crowded brain no, but his planning and his ability to ensnare almost everyone around him to his benefit was remarkable. If only he hadn't been so corrupted by the Death Note and turned into a completely basket case…his talents could have been very useful and beneficial to more than just himself. And…L could have fallen very hard for him. He hadn't ever met someone that could match his own intellect, so when he did it was difficult not to want something to come of it even if the someone was a male. He had hoped against reason that Light wasn't Kira. He sighed _Why did I have to be right…at least them I could attempt to form something, and if it was anyone else I would be safe from this damn Death Note._

L wasn't afraid to die soon, if that was his fate. But he did hate himself for this failure, as well he should because the one time it had to happen it was probably going to cost countless more people their lives. I knew that Near or Mellow…or even both of them together would be able to figure something out when the time was right. They had to, because god help this planet if they failed right alongside him. But he couldn't wallow in self-pity or go over the things he could have tried to do differently, he could only admit that he lost, and maybe that he deserved to die with all the people that were going to be killed because of it. He would feel a little bit better if he could manage to get a confession out of Light before it happened though, and that was selfish, he didn't deserve that kind of closure after letting the whole world down. _Still,_ he thought, _it would be nice…_

Light kept glancing at him so he turned back around to pretend to be doing busywork. Lights subtle mocking was only going to piss him off and he didn't want to make a bigger fool of himself than he already had. So instead he munched on his treats and read through all the names in the Death Note. _I guess there are worse ways to go…_

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 _ **Thanks for reading! Come back tomorrow for the next chunk of the story. Please review! I love reading what everyone has to say.**  
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	2. Plan in Motion

**Light POV**

It was hell waiting for everyone to finally go to bed, they all could have gone early since, as far as they were concerned, the case was at a standstill until more killings began, but they were all still up until midnight. Light was the last one to go, aside from L. If L chose tonight to not go to his room Light would never get his chance, but surely he would...eventually. Light was knew he would be safe from being discovered by cameras whenever he made it to L's room because L had them removed pretty much as soon as they were separated. Everywhere else still had them though so Light had no choice but to head to his own room and wait around for a few hours before trying to go knock on the door of "the world's greatest detective". Which Light supposed he was because, although he hadn't been able to prove it, L had always been telling him that the chances were high that he was Kira.

Light was positive that L knew he had been beat, he was sure he saw it in his almost expressionless face when their eyes had met earlier. And that just made this all the more delicious, L knew, and yet he was completely helpless. And what was better was he had stopped trying to insist that Light was Kira, he hadn't said a word about it all day.

Light knew how he was going to make this happen, he would show up at L's door in only pajama pants, he would come in and sit real close, close enough that L would feel his breath and that it he shifted, even a little, their bodies would brush. Light would surprise L, catch him off guard so that he would be to distracted by what was happening that he wouldn't even think about it since he was finally going to get what Light knew he yearned for. He was sure it would work, and then he would take him, hard and fast and brutal, and maybe, just maybe after he was finished he would whisper with the voice of a lover, "You Lose" right in his ear. Then he could pull his pants back on and walk out of there and L wouldn't say a damn thing because he wouldn't have any proof, and without proof no one would believe him. It was so sweet just to think about, he wasn't sure how long he would be able to wait if L wasn't in his room the first time he went to check.

Light finally got to his room and immediately stripped out of his uncomfortable professional clothes, trading them for a pair of PJ bottoms that rode low on his hips. He decided to skip the underwear; since he was planning on getting naked again anyway they would just get in the way. He lay outstretched on is bed and tried not to get too excited. He didn't need to do anything to occupy his mind to keep from falling asleep; he wasn't going to be able to sleep until this was done, but he had to find something to distract him from his worries that L would be in one of his moods to just not move to his room now that Light wasn't there to insist, it was irritating, this worry. A God shouldn't have to worry about such things.

He decided to read, since he couldn't get on the internet to research more criminals to punish once L was out of the way, his searches would show up on L's computer and he didn't need him barging in here asking why he was looking up those people, that would ruin his element of surprise and that was the most important part. Light could hardly focus on the words of his book, his mind always drifting back to L and what he was about to do.

 **L POV**

L was sitting on his bed with his laptop; it was more comfortable than the computer desk downstairs, even though he sat the same way he always did, probably just because it was softer maybe. It was late, three or so in the morning and he wasn't the least bit tired. But he was very surprised when there was a knock at his door. Who the hell would be up this late? He put the computer down and went to opened the door...and find Light, in just PJ bottoms, PJ bottoms that were so low it was easy to tell that there was nothing else there. _What the hell is this…?_

"Oh, hello Light." He said as if he was unfazed. "What are you still doing up this late? As I recall you hated that I would always be up making noise that kept you awake past midnight."

"Yeah well I guess I'm just so used to that routine that I can't sleep. Can I come in?"

"I suppose…"

Light walked by him before he had a chance to step away from the door, causing his arm to brush against L's chest and stomach. He went and laid on the same side of the bed he used when they had been cuffed together, hands behind his head and ankles crossed. L stared at him and put his thumb in his mouth, a nervous tick he got when he needed to think.

"So…what is on your mind Light?"

"Nothing. I guess…." He laughed like he was nervous, "I guess I just missed being here…"

L tilted his head to the side, "Did you? I remember nothing but pleas and constant bitching for you to have your own room, and now that you have it, you come right back here…why?"

"Well jeeze L, after being cuffed to you and forced to share a bed with you for so many weeks….well it's hard to get used to the quite…to the fact that you wouldn't be right next to me anymore. I guess I'm just lonely is all…"

"I see. Well what about yesterday? I didn't hear an complaints of loneliness yesterday."

"Yesterday was exhausting, I didn't even need to think about it. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was out. But today…today was the most normal day I've had since I've been here. So…yeah I couldn't sleep."

L eyed the boy. This was Kira, and Kira wouldn't be here for such a transparent reason. Light was a good actor and to anyone else the story would have made perfect sense, but to L…well something was really off about this. But until he figured out what this was all about he had best play like he didn't see anything wrong with what was going on. So he took his place on the bed next to Light, sitting in his favorite way with his toes over the edge of the bed, and his back to Light. Being this close to him had never made L uncomfortable before, in fact he was sure it had made Light uncomfortable no matter how many times they came to bed. He always looked like he would rather sleep on the floor than risk accidentally scooting to close to L so that they touched. But not now, now he seemed very pleased to be here.

He did his best to ignore Light, which wasn't hard, at least not at first, because that's what he normally did when he was working anyway. But then Light sat up on his knees and scooted closer to him to look over his shoulder at the computer. _Okay…what the_ fuck, _there is no doubt that this isn't the same Light that I've gotten to know, that Light cherished personal space like physical human contact was toxic…_ And yet L could feel the boy's breath on his neck and when Light spoke it ticked his ear.

"What are you doing L?"

"Working." He said, keeping his voice monotone like normal.

Light sighed, "Of course you are. Why don't you take a break for once?"

L looked over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow at him, "I don't need breaks until this thing is officially over."

He felt Light lean closer so that his chest was barely touching L's back, "L, you know that we haven't ever talked about anything other than the case?"

L frowned and stood up to put his computer on the nightstand. He turned to face the boy on his bed. When Light showed up at his door he had been surprised, but then it did make sense if he had come here to gloat in some way. Not that he would come right out with a confession, but he was here for something very Kira-like. This was more like the Light that had been before he had gone into solitary…cocky, calculating, like he owned everything in his sight. Light after solitary had still been cocky, but he hid it very well behind false humility. It was just one change, but it was huge. L was suddenly on red alert for a trick or _something._ This was the Light that was Kira, and him being here couldn't be good…

"What are you really doing here Light? This is completely ass backwards from how you have been behaving for most of the time that I've known you."

"I told you," he said scooting so that his knees were at the edge of the bed, "I was lonely, and I was hoping that we could do something other than worry about the case for once."

"Do something….like what…?" L said, his voice full of suspicion now.

Light sat up on his knees, so that their faces were level, "Something like this." He said and kissed L full on the mouth.

L didn't feel shocked often, but this was one of those times. Light had his hands in his hair and was _kissing_ him for fucks sake. This was not normal behavior but L couldn't help himself from responding. Although he forced his arms to stay at his sides he did kiss Light back, sucking on his lower lip and sighing _well...what is one more fuck up after everything else.._. Light pressed their mouths harder together, using his tongue to demand better access...trying to take control of the situation he had created. _Wait a minute..._

L moved quickly, grabbing the cuffs off the nightstand and getting one side on Lights wrist before he knew what was happening. When he started to struggle L pushed him onto his belly and put his knee in his back. He got the long cuff chain laced through the headboard panels and on Lights other wrist while the boy tried to throw him off. When L was done he jumped off him and stood back up. The cuffs where long enough that Light could sit in the middle of the bed, but not do much else. He was cuffed facing the headboard so if he tried to turn around the chain would cross and only become more restrictive.

"What the fuck L! Let me go!"

"Why don't you tell me what the hell that was, and maybe I'll think about it."

"What do you mean? You know exactly what that was. I've been trying to hint and you since I got in here and obviously you needed a direct approach. What the hell is wrong with acting out on a crush?" He was struggling now, tugging at the chains even though he knew it wasn't going to help.

"You haven't fooled me once _Kira,"_ he spat, "And I know you well enough to know what this is. I don't know why you thought I would submit so easily but now it's your turn to lose."

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 **Thanks for reading (again) Reviews are always awesome! Next bit/last chapter will be up tomorrow morning at the latest.  
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	3. Victory

**Light POV**

 _No! This isn't how this was supposed to go!_ Light looked at the cuffs on his wrists, and then up at L who was staring at him. _Okay,_ he thought, _I should be able to talk my way out of this…_

"L what is wrong with you? I'm not Kira, we caught Kira…" He didn't know what else to say, all he could do was remain in denial.

"Honestly Light, I don't want to sit here and listen you try to talk your way out of this. I know that you are Kira, and I want to hear you say it. By the time I am through with you you'll be begging for me to take you."

"That's okay!" Light said, "That's what I came here for…but, L…you need to unchain me first."

L got on the bed and sat in between Lights chained arms, touching his chest and stomach with touches so soft they were almost not there. And to Lights horror his body was responding. _No,_ he groaned in his head, _this isn't what I wanted…I shouldn't be reacting with anything other than rage…_ But against his logic, he shivered at the ghost like touches he was covered with.

"Light, I can't unchain you. I will lose all the power you have so foolishly allowed me to take. I know what you came here for," L had moved his head to Lights ear and he whispered "But now you're not the one who will be doing the fucking." And then he licked Lights ear before moving down to his neck. "You thought you would just come up here and take me didn't you?" He said, dropping kisses on Lights neck every few words, "Well that's not going to happen now is it?" more kisses, now on his collar bone, "I know that this was probably very important to your twisted ego, Kira."

Light was trembling now, he put his fists on his knees and tried to get a grip. But then, _oh god…_ L's mouth was at his nipple and his hands were on his hips. Light tried to control himself, but the sensation was so overwhelming that he couldn't help but hiss through his teeth and arch into L's mouth. _I don't understand…a God should not be made to react to something he doesn't want…_

"But," L said still making his way down Lights body with kisses, "I will be very happy to give you the release you are so desperately going to need…" He licked his way back up Lights body all the way to his ear and whispered to him again, "So long as you submit to me and tell me that you are Kira."

 _Never,_ Light thought. He had already given L to much of a submissive reaction, but there was no way he was admitting to anything.

"But L….I…I'm not Kira…"

"Liar." L said and bit down on Lights shoulder.

Light cried out and pulled on the cuffs. L got from in between his arms and moved behind him and…he started trying to get his bottoms off. Light fought him as best he could, but the damn handcuffs made it difficult and soon, without hardly any effort from L, he was completely naked. L came back around and sat next to him.

"See Light? At least part of you wants this," he said and gripped his erection, "no matter how much you fight, you know you want to say it." L started pumping on him, slow, so painstakingly slow. Light was panting and trying to concentrate, trying to find something to say…

"L…I'm not going to admit to something that is not true…" he gasped as L's hand tightened, "I mean, what are you going to do if I don't? Refuse to gratify me? I can do that myself, you will have to let me go eventually."

"Yes, I will have to let you go eventually. But Light, I have all night and I won't need that long to get you to confess."

L let go of Light and stood back up. Light watched him strip; revealing a body that was in better shape than it should have been with all the sugar that went through it. Light swallowed and met L's eyes. Those eyes that could make anyone feel like they were being dissected, even a God. Especially when that God and no control over what was happening, which shouldn't have been possible. _Okay, all I have to do is deal with this until morning if he doesn't get bored and let me go early…how hard could it be? I've gone my whole life resisting things like this…_

L crawled back on the bed and between the cuff chain again so he could face Light. Light hardly saw him move, one second he was staring at those black eyes and the next L had his lips wrapped around the tip of Light arousal. In spite of himself Light groaned, _oh fuck,_ he thought, _I never knew this could feel so good._ He knew he was supposed to be focusing, L was trying to trick him…but the suction from that trained-by-lollipops mouth had his head spinning, but then L was clawing at his hips and bobbing his head and Light jerked up into L's mouth, moaning and tugging at the chain that wouldn't budge no matter how hard he pulled. He might have forgotten his own name if L hadn't stopped. But he did and when he looked at Light he smiled and licked his lips. Light squeezed his eyes shut and panted

"Come on Light, say it."

"L please, I don't—"

"Say it and I will make you feel so much better."

"But L…" he didn't even bother to finish, it was futile, all he could do was grit his teeth and bare this torture until sunrise.

"Fine," L sighed, "It's not like I don't have time."

L got up and moved behind him on the bed again. Lights head was yanked back by his hair, L sucking leaning over his shoulder to suck on his exposed throat from behind. When L grasped his painfully hard erection again Light whimpered, a desperate and pathetic noise that had no business coming from his body. L's hand working him, his mouth at his throat and his hand fisted in his hair…it was unbearable. Light was helpless to do anything but try to cling to the reason why he shouldn't tell L that he was Kira and let himself be taken.

 **L POV**

L was enjoying this probably more than he should be. Having Light….Kira…helpless and exposed was more than he could have asked for at this point. He worked Light and sucked at his throat, listening to the sounds that Kira was making, he almost wanted to forget about the whole confession thing and just take him right now. He stroked Lights cock and rubbed his thumb over the slit and Kira gasped for him and started panting.

"Please…L…"

L released his hold on the boys neck and licked the spot he had just been savaging before whispering "Say it."

Light cried out and L started pumping faster. "Say it and I'll fuck you Light, I'll give you want you want now."

"God, L…I'm not…"

L stopped everything at once, the pumping, the hair pulling and the kisses. Light chocked out something and hung his head, gasping for air. L pressed his stomach to Kiras back and ran his hands up his stomach and kissed his shoulder. Light shuddered before L moved to sit next to him. Light turned his head to look at him.

"L…"

L leaned back on one hand and started touching himself, keeping eye contact with his captive. He bit down on his lip before tilting his head back. "You know Light," he breathed when he looked back at him, "I am fine with just leaving you there and taking care of myself. Having you all trapped, desperate and out of breath will suit me just fine."

Kira wasn't looking at his face, he was watching L's hand has he stroked himself, so L sped up and moaned. He heard Light suck in a breath but otherwise he remained silent. L stopped and thought, _Well…I guess its time to take it further._ He reached up and shoved Light forward so he was on his hands on knees. Then he grabbed his dick and again and at the same time shoved one figure inside him. Light screamed and pushed back onto L's hand. L was losing patience, he needed this to be over with _now._ So instead of taking his time he assaulted Lights prostate over and over again, timing it with each stroke he gave the boys desperate erection. He bit down on Lights hip causing the boy to add another scream to his moaning. It wasn't long before he was chanting L's name between cries.

"Oh god! Please…L…please…"

And at this L stopped everything at once again. Light sobbed and begged. "Please L, please, more, don't stop…" L could tell that Kira was ready to give up _Thank God…_

"Say. It."

Light whispered something.

"I can't here you Light. You want more don't you?"

Lighted turned his head and looked back at him, through gritted teeth and with eyes full of hate he said "I am Kira."

L smacked his ass, "Louder!"

Light cried out again and screamed "I'm Kira! I'm Kira, you were right," he was starting to thrash and sob, "fuck L, you were right. Please…I said it…please…just do it…"

L smiled to himself and said with as smug a voice as he could "Do what Kira?"

"God damn it L! Just fuck me already! I can't take this anymore!"

Before the sentence was even finished L had himself positioned behind Light. He buried himself deep and got to moving right away. Why should he care if he hurt Kira? Light screamed again, moving himself back and L thrust forward, he had lost all control of himself at this point begging for L to make him cum. L slammed into him faster and grabbed his shoulders for leverage, digging his nails in. He wasn't going to last long, but first…

"Say it again and I'll let you come."

"I'm Kira!" Light moaned.

L growled and reached around to stroke Lights cock again. As fast and as hard as he could until he felt is own orgasm coming, there was no way Light was far behind so he grabbed a fist full of his hair and shoved his head down into the matters, causing the cuffs around his wrists to bite in when his shoulders hit the bed.

"Oh fuck!" L moaned and finally came. Light was right behind him and shot out all over his hand. L let go of him and continued his thrusts until he was emptied. Then he collapsed trying to catch his breath. He didn't stay still for long, he wanted Light out of here now that he got his confession. He got up, unlocked both wrists and watched Light…Kira…climb of the bed and pull his PJs back on. When he got to the door he turned to look at L.

"You still have no proof. And you are still going to die." And then he was gone.

L lay down and stared at the ceiling. No, he didn't have proof, and yes he was still going to die. But at least he got the one thing he wanted before that happened. _My only victory over Kira…_ That had been better than he could have imagined. And all things considered, his life and been good. Before L knew it he had actually drifted to sleep.

 **End**

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 **Thank you for reading! I would love to know what everyone thought :)  
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